I've been looking back over some of my old blog entries. And some of them are pretty good. It doesn't feel like arrogance to say that, because I don't really identify with the person who wrote them. The me of then is entirely different from the me of now (me) (no... me).
I'm actually really proud that I've kept this up for so long. If you've read much of this blog, you'll know how difficult I find it to motivate myself to do creative stuff (some people might call it laziness). Even though I haven't recorded any songs for ages, or done any stand-up comedy, or written any scripts, I feel that this has been a valuable creative outlet. It makes me feel like I'm not entirely wasting my life (or if I am, I'm wasting it in an amusing fashion).
I get a real rush from doing creative things. I remember when I first tried out my podcast software, I was so proud of the rubbish little clip of nonsense, I was on a high. Art is truly the best drug. Except for marijuana. And cocaine. And heroin, mushrooms, caffeine, alcohol, amphetamines and Calpol. But it shits all over solvents. If you're abusing solvents, you really need to develop a backbone.
I should do public information films for schools.
I'm thinking about getting a video camera and sticking videos up on youtube. They'll probably just be montages of me gurning for hours over an eclectic soundtrack. I can see myself getting lots of views. I could become a phenomenon. I'm already a phenomenon in my own time, my own mind, and my own pants. I just need to project.
But this blog is something. At least I haven't been completely wasting my time. Not completely.
