Sonny's Sodding

There are eight million stories in the Snaked City. This is one of them:

Hisssssssss.

***

That's what I went for for an opening.

For for. Two instances of the same word, next to each other in a sentence. But not a mistake. I made a similar breakthrough the last time I had had too much coffee.

Had had.

Two instances of the same word, next to each other in a sentence. But not a mistake.

An opportunity.

I'm currently going through a long spreadsheet, manually deleting some numbers and some ampersands. I'm up to the 'P's, so I think I deserve a break.

You'd think that manually deleting some numbers and some ampersands would be boring. To some extent, it is boring. But I like having something to occupy my mouse finger. Idle mouse fingers are the devil's playthings.

I can't do it automatically. I know I could Ctrl+F and then replace or delete things. But I don't know which numbers and ampersands I need to delete. I don't want to get rid of them all. I...

*splutter*

Oh god. I was telling you about the ampersands and the numbers, wasn't I? You don't need to know. I'm sorry. That's a textbook case of TMI (too many informations). Awkward, it was. Spreadsheets have no place in public discourse.

Splutter is a weird word. What's the etymology?

Apparently, it's a contraction of "exploding butter". It makes sense. If you have a mouth full of butter shrapnel (an offshoot of love shrapnel), you do tend to splutter. Nice one, Dr Johnson.

I just BLASTED through S.

I'm on a roll. I'll come back later.

***

It's later. The spreadsheet it but a distant memory, albeit one which may overlay tonight's dreams with an oppressive grid.

I've just finished reading A Tale of Two Cities.

It's pretty fantastic.

It's a shame, really. I'd always hoped that the great classics of literature were all a bit overrated and a waste of time. But it seems that their reputation is earned. Now I need to read all of them, and I really don't have the time. I watched the film Darkman last night. Ninety-six minutes. I can't claim to be making the best of my life.

You know what? Screw it. I can claim to be making the best of my life.

I am making the best of my life.

I have spent about four minutes watching dogs falling in unison. You can do the same:

I know that funny animal gifs are generally shared by shallow, damaged people. But look at them!

If you're damaged, you're not shallow. Damage is deep dish fo sho.

It's late. I'd be better off asleep. I'm going now. This post has been weird. I'm weird. This is all just...

*butter*