Monday, 8 December 2008

Open your mind and close your legs

I think I've stumbled blindly into a fetish.

When I was trying to think of a name for this blog, I went through some names that were already used. I thought I might want to call it something wrestling-related, as it's one of my main interests. Lucy suggested Headscissors. It's a wrestling move. It also sounds cool: "I'm scissoring up your mind! I'm cutting your brain to ribbons! Everything you thought was wrong, and everything you thought was wrong was wrong, but not in the way you thought!"

I thought I was the coolest man alive (James Brown had recently died).

But it seems that everything has not only already been done, but has been done with the express purpose of giving people erections.

I have stumbled into a fetish. Headscissors is a fetish.

To be fair, it's basis is still as a wrestling move. But instead of Dory Funk Jr using the headscissors as a way to wear down Jack Brisco in a sixty-minute mat clinic, it's 'the girl Nadège from Belgium' performing the act on a middle-aged man.

I found this out by looking at the videos chosen as related to the video I posted below. On the right-hand side of the Youtube page you can see Nadège and other similar people.

One of my key words related to this blog. These are headscissors-related videos. It seems it was a mistake.

As fetishes go, it could be a lot worse. I don't fancy having my head squeezed between the thighs of a dominant woman. But everyone's different; I say tomato, you say 'I... can't... breathe!'. I'm not anti-fetish. I may not understand them, but what you do in your own home is none of my business.

But it doesn't instil much confidence in the artistic merit of my own video when it's associated with 'See How Pretty Femdom Does Her Headscissor Moves! Must See!'. The content of that video is almost entirely distinct from the content of mine.

It wasn't like this when I first posted it! There were links to self-help videos, which was understandable. But this was a little unexpected. I suppose 'headscissors' is a more popular search term than 'self-help'. I can't decide if that's a good thing. It does explain the comment I got at the bottom of this entry, I suppose.

I don't really know how to react. I suppose the chances of choosing a blog name that doesn't have sexual connotations are slim. It's lucky I didn't go for 'Piledriver'. That could have been a lot worse.

I suppose the question is: do I feel uncomfortable with the thought of people masturbating whilst reading this?

And the answer is: no, not really.

I kind of assumed it would happen. After all there are pictures of me on here, and people are only human.

I assume that there's a few masturbators for every post, male and female. Perhaps when I'm talking about politics or evolution the number goes down slightly. And likewise, when I'm talking about waffles, the number increases.

I'm fine with it. If you're masturbating right now, you have my full support. As long as no-one is being hurt (or in the case of headscissors, no-one is being hurt against their will), I condone and endorse your fetishes.

I think we should all be tolerant of people and their preferences. One man's pervert is another man's messiah (in some extreme cases).

This blog is a broad church. Some people come for the inflammatory rhetoric, some come for the moving prose, some come for the amusing comedy slant I give on everyday life, some come for the philosophy. And some come because they want to be trapped in the inescapable thighscissor of a Chinese boy, and punched in the head.

And I think we should be glad that we live in such a free society that so many different pursuits are allowed. We shouldn't value one above the other. As Jeremy Bentham said,
"Prejudice apart, the game of push-pin is of equal value with the arts and sciences of music and poetry."

He didn't mention headscissors. But on utilitarian grounds, we have to assume he was up for it.


  1. Anonymous14:42:00

    longest time in a chinese headscissor was 70 minutes while a brawl on the beach 2007!The boy was wearing only thong and his thighs were hard as steel!

  2. Anonymous19:27:00

    to be trapped in asian boys headscissor is greatest humiliation for married white man!

  3. Anonymous08:21:00

    It's quite humiliating for a 180cm tall 80kg man to have his head trapped for long periods of time between the thighs of a 155cm tall 45kg girl, and be squeezed into submission and made to beg for mercy.

  4. Anonymous10:19:00

    It's quite humiliating for a 180cm tall 80kg man to walk around in circles with a 155cm tall 45kg girl squeezing his head between her thighs and her arms locked around his waist, unable to escape from the hold.

  5. Yeah, that is quite humiliating. Just QUITE, though. Not too bad. A bit like realising you've spilt soup on your shirt.

  6. Anonymous15:08:00

    It's not only humiliating, but it's scary for a 180cm tall 80kg man to have his hands tied behind his back, his ankles tied together and tape over his mouth to muffle his grunts and groans as a 155cm tall 45kg girl squeezes his head mercilessly between her thighs.

  7. Anonymous06:58:00

    It's definitely humiliating for a 180cm tall 80kg man to have two girls around 155cm tall and 45kg take turns squeezing his head between their thighs as they laugh and chat.

  8. Anonymous14:56:00

    It's definitely humiliating for a 180cm tall 80kg man to be on his hands and knees with his head hopelessly buried between the thighs of a 155cm tall 45kg girl as she leans back on her hands and squeezes, with several other girls watching and chatting with her.

  9. Anonymous04:02:00

    When I was a young boy I watched pro wrestling on the little TV in my room on Saturdays, and one day I was completely overwhelmed by this match between a strong, shapely blonde woman and a smaller but strong, shapely Japanese woman. After working over the poor Japanese woman for awhile, the blonde made the mistake of clamping another headlock on her and taking her down to the mat to work her over some more - the Japanese woman swung her legs up and clamped them around the blonde's head, forcing her to break her headlock! The blonde managed to kick out of it, but as soon as she scrambled to her feet, the Japanese woman jumped up and took her right back down with a flying headscissors! This time the blonde was in serious trouble, as she kicked and kicked and kicked but remained trapped in the headscissors! She managed to get to a position on her hands and knees and tried to somersault out of it but landed on her back, still trapped! Again she kicked and kicked and finally kicked out, but as soon as she scrambled to her feet, her Japanese opponent again jumped up and took her right back down with another flying headscissors, and this time really poured on the pressure, raising her hips and the blonde's head and shoulders up off the mat, and slamming her down again and again! I thought the Japanese woman was going to scissor the blonde's head right off her shoulders! The blonde finally managed to kick out, and this time instead of scrambling to her feet, she crawled to the edge of the ring and rolled right out to get a brief respite from her opponent's legs!

  10. Anonymous05:14:00

    A great headscissors was in a Japanese women's pro wrestling match in the early 1980's between two very cute and shapely wrestlers. One wrestler softened up her opponent first by a painful surfboard hold, then locking on a bodyscissors, rocking her back, lifting her up and slamming her keister to the mat again and again and again, then clamping on a figure 4 headscissors and rolling and flipping her over again and again and again. The wrestler trapped in the headscissors finally got one of her legs on the rope, and the ref forced a break.

  11. Anonymous12:49:00

    A great headscissors sequence was in a pro wrestling match in the 1950's between two evenly-matched fit men. One wrestler clamped a side headscissors on his opponent and worked him over with it for a good 3 minutes before the other wrestler finally kicked out of it and scrambled to his feet, only to be immediately taken down with a flying headscissors! Again trapped, he struggled for another minute or so and finally kicked out of it and scrambled to his feet only to be immediately taken down with another flying headscissors! The trapped wrestler pounded his boots on the mat in frustration, and kicked and kicked and kicked to no avail. He struggled to a position on his hands and knees with his head buried between his opponent's thighs, and tried to yank his head out, to no avail. He tried to somersault out of it, but landed on his back, still trapped. Again he pounded his boots on the mat in frustration, then got to the hands and knees position and somersualted close to the edge of the ring where he got a boot on the bottom rope, and the ref ordered a break.

  12. I'm thinking of releasing all these in a book.

  13. Anonymous00:37:00

    I have seen a video from a women's wrestling club of a match between Brenda, a veteran wrestler in her 30's, and Sheila, her 19-year-old challenger.
    For a while Brenda dominates her young challenger, but then makes the mistake of allowing Sheila to wrap her thighs around her head from behind, and secure one of her arms by grabbing hold of her wrist with both hands.
    Brenda tries desperately to pry apart Sheila's locked feet with her free hand, but cannot do it. She manages to roll to a position on her knees and struggles furiously to yank her head free, lifting Sheila's hips up off the mat again and again, but each time sinks back down, her head still hopelessly buried between the teenager's thighs. Sheila continues to pour on the pressure, making Brenda groan. Sheila rolls the weakened Brenda over on her side. The camera is behind the women, and we can see Brenda's back and her neck disappearing between Sheila's unforgiving thighs. The camera moves around to the other side and now we can see Brenda's red, contorted face as her head is being squeezed mercilessly between Sheila's thighs. The referee asks Brenda if she submits, but Brenda just grunts and groans. The referee orders Sheila to break the hold, and the teenager is declared the winner.

  14. Anonymous17:01:00

    There is a Japanese video in which two cute schoolgirls with perfect legs take turns torturing a powerfully built male bodybuilder with figure 4 headscissors. After several minutes of the first girl's torturous headscissors, it seems the poor guy has already had enough, but, alas, no rest for the weary as the second girl swiftly clamps on her headscissors and continues the torture...

  15. Anonymous01:23:00

    ... The second girl really works the man over, making him grunt and groan. But this is apparently just the beginning! As the second girl continues the figure 4, the first girl snakes her legs around the man's stomach and puts on the squeeze! At this point the man starts to put up a serious struggle to escape, but the two girls secure both of his arms to make that impossible, and they continue to crush his head and stomach with their perfect legs...

  16. Anonymous04:18:00

    When I was a 14-year-old boy I suffered the humiliation of having my head trapped between the legs of a 9-year-old boy I was babysitting for long periods of time, and being made to submit to his headscissors. Todd loved to watch pro wrestling and he wanted to practice wrestling holds on me on the thick carpet in the recreation room. He loved to sit on the carpet, leaning back on his hands as if he was sunbathing at the beach with me on my hands and knees, facing toward him with my head buried between his thighs, and challenge me to free my head. I would try to yank my head free to no avail as Todd squeezed, keeping my head locked tight. I would attempt to somersault out of it, but Todd would grab hold of my waist and throw me over on my back. I would swing my legs up and try to kick out, again and again and again, to no avail. I would arch my back and try to bridge out of it, but eventually sink back down, still trapped. I would manage to roll over to the position on my hands and knees, and Todd would lean back on his hands and gleefully challenge me to free my head again...

  17. Sorry everyone, but I think I'm going to have to call an end to this comment fest. It's been educational.