Look! Up in the sky!

I've invented a super hero called 'The Khaki Dynamo'. I say created, I just came up with the name. I think he might be very militaristic, very middle-class, or just very boring.

He can join the epic ranks of my other creations such as Paddy O'Paque, the cartoon character whose problems all derive from the fact that he isn't transparent.

***

I hate applying for jobs. I feel like I have to lie about how much I want each job when I apply, and if I'm successful, my reward for this deception is having to work somewhere boring every day. Having said that, I'm just as miserable when I'm not working, as I have no money and am treated like a bum by everyone (although the change does come in handy).

I need money to support myself while I pursue a career I actually want (writer, astronaut, porn star), but if I get a job, I won't have any time to spend on doing the things I like (writing, holding my breath, oiling myself up).

Also, I can't afford anywhere to live until I have a job, but can't get one until I know where we'll be living.

This whole scenario is less a Catch 22, and more of a Catch 66 (that's three times worse). Hopefully when The Adventures of the Khaki Dynamo are released, and the film adaptation is made (starring Bill Pullman), I'll have enough money to shoot for the stars (porn or celestial).

***

I watched Heroes the other day. It was... ok. I'll give it some more time. The trouble with all these US dramas is they've got huge budgets and great concepts, but don't have any good characters or dialogue (see Betty, Ugly).

I call this 'Lost Syndrome'. I watched Lost when it started, and every week I would think "this isn't very well written, I won't watch this again". Then some plot twist would happen at the end to keep me tuning in. This happened for about half of the first season, with me just clinging on. Then one week, it didn't work. So I stopped watching.

It's a shame, because there are some great ideas in these things. But ideas alone does (do?) not a successful programme make. Most British drama is the opposite: no ideas, but good dialogue and characters.

This is the reason I don't really watch any TV drama (except Dawson's Creek; that shit is raw!). It's too much of an investment. I just watch 80 different comedy panel shows a week and giggle like a lobotomised chimp.

***

I have to go now and write about how 'passionate I am about joining such a prestigious firm' and stuff like that. I might gain some excitement from the process by changing the font to Wingdings, and then changing it back again.

And later, I'll look towards the night sky and dream...