All Natural

Lucy and I like to describe things as "nature's [blank]".

I think it is an expression in common usage. Flowers are nature's perfume. Water is nature's soft drink. Trees are nature's parasol.

But we like to use it as meaninglessly as possible:

Legs are nature's arms

Windows are nature's ghosts

Our favourite is:

Bacon is nature's chips.

Because that sort-of makes sense. But not if you think about it for more than a second.

I like using 'nature' indiscriminately, because everyone does that nowadays.

[Disclaimer: anyone who claims something is done "nowadays" is generally wrong, and always an idiot]

I may have written before about the arbitrary separation between nature (good, wholesome, innocent, perfect, peaceful, noble, angelic) and things that are man-made (ugly, evil, dirty, deviant, cynical, charred, tacky).

There's no real distinction between man-made things and nature. We are nature. Nature is just Stuff That Is There.

But you still get foods advertised as having 'only REAL ingredients'. Instead of the artificial ingredients, made of prurient hate.

I like the modern world. And for all its faults, it's no worse than the old days, where people lived in the treetops, drank rainwater, rode giraffes, hugged acorns and died at 30.

So, why not try using "nature's [blank]" as freely and as incongruously as possible.

Stupid jokes are nature's self-esteem.